A letter to Nate, on his 6th birthday...

Dear Nate,

6 years ago today, I was in the MOST excruciating pain of my life and gave birth to you, my handsome, sweet little guy. You are named after my Dad, and you definitely have his amazing blue eyes. You have an amazing laugh that is infectious. You carry so much light with you. You have so much patience for your pushy, naughty, sister and I love you for that. I also know how very much you love that little bundle of naughtiness, and she loves you more.

I love how you CONSISTENTLY prove me wrong when I try and underestimate you. You are so smart and I love how you show everyone you what you CAN do.

You have autism, it does NOT have you.

Some things we've put behind us, and others we never shall, but there's a flow to it all that has become familiar. There are times I fear that storm might pull me under, moments where I think I just can't cope enough with you, do enough for you or predict enough of your future to do any of us any good. Then there are other times when my feet plant themselves back into the dry desert Arizona sand and I can breathe steadily again because you have done something to remind me you are an amazing person. I should not underestimate you. Ever. These experiences have brought us here, to a place where our life no longer feels abnormal.

Your autism is a challenge, I will not deny it. For you, for me, and for your father and sister, too. But you are healthy and bright. You DID learn how to show us you are in there..and you have a LOT to say. You DID learn to enjoy being with family and even more so, to feel affection for others outside your family: your grandparents, our friends, your teachers. You continue to have fun on a playground and in a swimming pool and not be afraid. And each and every day, you teach me and everyone who knows you something new about your world; you teach us what autism truly is. I often receive praise for being your advocate, but you, my silent little man, are fast becoming your own.

I love you so much and I am SO VERY PROUD to call you my son. I can't wait to see what amazing things this year brings your way! You Dad, your sister, and I will be right here behind you, cheering til we are blue in the face!..and then we won't stop, we'll just cheer a little softer.

Nate T., I couldn't possibly love you more.

~Mom

My sweet boy on his first birthday.

Neve decorated the wall with birthday pictures of Nate's party guests. :)

Thank you so much to Nate's Grandparents, Aunts, Uncle, therapists, and friends for all the cards, presents and birthday wishes!